Before the answers, more questions

I've been meditating and writing and reading, trying to suss out the name of the weight on my heart this Elul. The answers, not surprisingly, are not new. But before I get there, I feel like I need to sharpen, or in this case broaden, the questions I am asking. So, here we go:

Where and when am I acting out of fear or greed? Why?

What am I afraid of?

When is enough? How can I learn to tell?

How can I replace with love my places of fear?

This is not new territory for me. It is a practice I learned from Rabbi Lerner - re-framing situations based on a continuum of love and fear, and trying to maximize the love in the world. I have spent a lot of time in the last year or so trying to see God in the stranger and identifying fear in the actions of others, but now I need to go internally and look at myself more deeply.

I also spent the last year wrapped up in the bliss of my new marriage. That's not to say married life is any less blissful now that our first anniversary passed (yesterday), but as the intensity has worn off to a healthy warm glow, it has revealed other areas in my life that need attention. This is good. More on this to come.